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alcohol
July 2009 
A Cass System
Posted on Jul 8th, 2009
by 
michaelsits
michaelsits
A Cass System
His white dress shirt is unbuttoned and his blue blazer stained with some red bean sauce on the right side near the pocket. He is barely walking in a straight line, more like an inchworm than a sword. But he is finding his way towards Ssangyong Junction to hail down a cab. It is 11:20p.m. His wife and children are home asleep, nearly two hours ago and a five-hour train ride if it was Friday night. It is Wednesday night and he will not se them till after work on Friday when he returns back to Cheongjiu. He hates his little studio apartment in Busan all by himself. He did not get married and have children so he could live alone seeing them on weekends. He blames the Americans and there lack of self-discipline for this. Sine they started with their recession, Korea has suffered even more harshly since a significant portion of their economy relies on the American lifestyle of luxuries and convenience. Now, he had to accept the transfer or be laid off. The transfer moved him across the country and far from his family.
He stumbles into the cab and barks his address at the cab driver while leaning back on the black seat. He can smell her perfume even this far away. He will never forget what she smelled like the first time they met at Sin Li Presbyterian Church. She was wearing a white dress with a hint of light pink. She looked so pure and innocent when her and her family first moved to the neighborhood. She sang all the hymns and bowed respectfully when it was called for. Anyone could see how well her parents raised her to be a good Christian girl. The perfect wife- beautiful, pure, honorable and a virgin. Her perfume made hi dizzy, still does Although she rarely wears any these days and it turns out she was not pure, innocent or virginal. But he still daydreams at night drunk about her. Of course, he was never drunk before the American recession. He only drank during customary and traditional circumstances then. Now, all he needs is for it to be dark and lonely. He has found a couple of guys who also live there only during the week while working and they frequent the Blue Café with the two for one bottles of Cass Beer nightly. Then finds his way back to his place and falls asleep in his work clothes from the day.
Damn Americans! The think they can do whatever they want and it doesn’t matter what or who it affects but themselves. George W. Bush? What did they expect? Now a Black person to fix their economy? No wonder everybody secretly hates them and wants them to fail. But whoever expected it to hurt so many people? This is what he thinks about while falling asleep at night. That and his wife’s perfume that used to wear before the show ended with marriage and children. Now she is twenty pounds heavier, no perfume, hair up all the time and sex on Saturday nights are obviously a chore to get through in marriage to make sure he keeps send the money to pay the bills on time. He can tell she is just doing it to make him feel happy or at least content till he leaves on Sunday night again. She can still smell the alcohol in his pores on Friday nights from Thursday night, well and the whole week really. They sure do put on a good show, he thinks to himself. Since she deceived him so much he feels that she should have sex with him whenever he wants as payment for the lies he believed. The lies she told him before he smoked cigarettes, drank Soju and Cass Beer and lived alone sending text messages back and forth about the children, school and bills. When she at least pretended to be the woman he married. Just because she does not honor the Korean Way does not mean he has to break tradition and get a divorce; he was not raised that way. They do not do that here. Marriage is for a lifetime regardless of what lies or pretenses the marriage was based on. He loved her and still does, even the woman she really is as well. You do not divorce your wife, period. Now what a man does when drunk in a café is another story but she deserves it for being such a liar and embarrassing him and his family. Besides, she is good with the children and if he needs to be with one of the special ladies in the Café once in a while that is his business, not hers.
He is almost asleep with the rooming spinning slightly. He wants to call her and wake her up just to hear her voice but the tears running down his cheeks drown his courage. He misses her and them so much. He hates being alone and drunk and smelling like a Café all the time. He wants to get back home to smell his wife, even if she is not the wife he thought he married, she is still his wife and he loves her.
Thank God for Cass Beer
His white dress shirt is unbuttoned and his blue blazer stained with some red bean sauce on the right side near the pocket. He is barely walking in a straight line, more like an inchworm than a sword. But he is finding his way towards Ssangyong Junction to hail down a cab. It is 11:20p.m. His wife and children are home asleep, nearly two hours ago and a five-hour train ride if it was Friday night. It is Wednesday night and he will not se them till after work on Friday when he returns back to Cheongjiu. He hates his little studio apartment in Busan all by himself. He did not get married and have children so he could live alone seeing them on weekends. He blames the Americans and there lack of self-discipline for this. Sine they started with their recession, Korea has suffered even more harshly since a significant portion of their economy relies on the American lifestyle of luxuries and convenience. Now, he had to accept the transfer or be laid off. The transfer moved him across the country and far from his family.
He stumbles into the cab and barks his address at the cab driver while leaning back on the black seat. He can smell her perfume even this far away. He will never forget what she smelled like the first time they met at Sin Li Presbyterian Church. She was wearing a white dress with a hint of light pink. She looked so pure and innocent when her and her family first moved to the neighborhood. She sang all the hymns and bowed respectfully when it was called for. Anyone could see how well her parents raised her to be a good Christian girl. The perfect wife- beautiful, pure, honorable and a virgin. Her perfume made hi dizzy, still does Although she rarely wears any these days and it turns out she was not pure, innocent or virginal. But he still daydreams at night drunk about her. Of course, he was never drunk before the American recession. He only drank during customary and traditional circumstances then. Now, all he needs is for it to be dark and lonely. He has found a couple of guys who also live there only during the week while working and they frequent the Blue Café with the two for one bottles of Cass Beer nightly. Then finds his way back to his place and falls asleep in his work clothes from the day.
Damn Americans! The think they can do whatever they want and it doesn’t matter what or who it affects but themselves. George W. Bush? What did they expect? Now a Black person to fix their economy? No wonder everybody secretly hates them and wants them to fail. But whoever expected it to hurt so many people? This is what he thinks about while falling asleep at night. That and his wife’s perfume that used to wear before the show ended with marriage and children. Now she is twenty pounds heavier, no perfume, hair up all the time and sex on Saturday nights are obviously a chore to get through in marriage to make sure he keeps send the money to pay the bills on time. He can tell she is just doing it to make him feel happy or at least content till he leaves on Sunday night again. She can still smell the alcohol in his pores on Friday nights from Thursday night, well and the whole week really. They sure do put on a good show, he thinks to himself. Since she deceived him so much he feels that she should have sex with him whenever he wants as payment for the lies he believed. The lies she told him before he smoked cigarettes, drank Soju and Cass Beer and lived alone sending text messages back and forth about the children, school and bills. When she at least pretended to be the woman he married. Just because she does not honor the Korean Way does not mean he has to break tradition and get a divorce; he was not raised that way. They do not do that here. Marriage is for a lifetime regardless of what lies or pretenses the marriage was based on. He loved her and still does, even the woman she really is as well. You do not divorce your wife, period. Now what a man does when drunk in a café is another story but she deserves it for being such a liar and embarrassing him and his family. Besides, she is good with the children and if he needs to be with one of the special ladies in the Café once in a while that is his business, not hers.
He is almost asleep with the rooming spinning slightly. He wants to call her and wake her up just to hear her voice but the tears running down his cheeks drown his courage. He misses her and them so much. He hates being alone and drunk and smelling like a Café all the time. He wants to get back home to smell his wife, even if she is not the wife he thought he married, she is still his wife and he loves her.
Thank God for Cass Beer
Access: Public
how did you come to write this? did you see someone like this or just imagine him? you did a good job bringing him to life, Michael. how much longer will you be there? how are the goodbyes going?
sorry, so many questions… you don't have to answer.
Thanks nicole for the questions. This came about from a couple iof different forms of reflection. One being this idea in my head that i want to convey some interesting cultural commentary but do not want to just write a bunch of broad-sweeping gerelizations that do not apply to all, or even the majority of koreans. teh peice about the girl crossing the street was one, there are others floating around in my head. Also, your comnets on the piece about the girl poked me to make some rebuttals in my head. I decided against that and figured sharing some other perspectives which i would be doing anyways would be a better way. One of the lessons i have learned here is how deeply entrenched culural programming is whether we ar talking about koreans, africans or north americans; we find it so hard to see beyong our own version ofhow the world does and should work. I have lost my interst in trying to open others eyes that are stuck in their own programming and all the layers of experiences that we interprit as evidence of our cultural/social/religious truths (Example: the war in Iraq, the middle east and its political, cultural and religious history of nearly 5000 years, Jews killig Jesus, Hollywood, Western individualism, White privelege, white female privilege especially, equal rights, North Korea, etc)
The story itself is partly from a couple of different men i have sat and walked with while hiking on the neighborhood moutntain, one i even soent an afternoon makign music together. Collectively the demonstrated to me how different expectations are here in korea of what one needs to do for family and how much american economy disrupts things globalay so much worse than within the USA itself. although americans complain and talk about it more than the rest of the world. Complaining is both a luxury and lifestyle that many cultures do not have. Since i walk nightly, i see the men in business uites straggling the streets together smelling if alcohol and smoking, more so than the in north america. I t has left a strong impression on me. Throw that all together and some fiction to connect it and you get what you got. Not my strongest or most inpsiring piece but it was challening to write.
i will be in morea till the end of august with most of august traveling around the country and this region of central asia. I have not started good byes yet but feel them sprouting on a daily basis. So much has happened for me here. I work only one week inaugust, strangely the second week. found out today they hae a replacment coming for the states and she will be here before i leave.Although i know wher i am going both before i leave and after, i have not felt any motion towards actual formal arrangements, which is pretty normal for me.
I think i got everything!
Peace,
michael
thank you for so thoroughly answering my questions! all the best with your goodbyes and all you must do over the coming weeks. love to you